My EX
First off, Thanx everyone for your warm welcome..I think i'm going to love this "virtual neighborhood" ;)
i was back at work today and if found out that one my colleagues just got engaged. I was very happy for her, cuz her ultimate goal was to marry someone loaded and marry into a well known familia. As the custom goes here, All the girls from the other departments were coming over to wish her luck and joy and all that..When it was my turn, she gave me a sly look and told me "al-fal lich". For some reason, her look was saying something like i feel sorry for you..
I know that people at work had been talking about my divorce like it was a big celebrity scandal. Everyone thought we were the perfect couple until last year when they started to realize that i wasn't the sweet, talkative, vivacious girl i had been before the marriage. But for some reason the girls look they are almost glad that i am separated...like whispering behind my back and so. Maybe i am rambling on, but it really hurt me the look she gave me. I tend to be very discreet about my failed marriage. My ex was in a very selfish, shallow, egotistical maniac. I tried leaving him 3 times during the years we were together,but everytime he implores me and begs me to get back to him..Finally, after one holiday spent entirely with him, i decided that it can never be mended. I had lost all respect and love for him. I'm already in tears again recalling all of this. i will have to stop. until next post
i was back at work today and if found out that one my colleagues just got engaged. I was very happy for her, cuz her ultimate goal was to marry someone loaded and marry into a well known familia. As the custom goes here, All the girls from the other departments were coming over to wish her luck and joy and all that..When it was my turn, she gave me a sly look and told me "al-fal lich". For some reason, her look was saying something like i feel sorry for you..
I know that people at work had been talking about my divorce like it was a big celebrity scandal. Everyone thought we were the perfect couple until last year when they started to realize that i wasn't the sweet, talkative, vivacious girl i had been before the marriage. But for some reason the girls look they are almost glad that i am separated...like whispering behind my back and so. Maybe i am rambling on, but it really hurt me the look she gave me. I tend to be very discreet about my failed marriage. My ex was in a very selfish, shallow, egotistical maniac. I tried leaving him 3 times during the years we were together,but everytime he implores me and begs me to get back to him..Finally, after one holiday spent entirely with him, i decided that it can never be mended. I had lost all respect and love for him. I'm already in tears again recalling all of this. i will have to stop. until next post
posted by samanthaq8 at 5:37 PM
8 Comments:
Sam.. I am not going to go through how the society is in here.. I am sure you are well aware of how small minded these people are in your office.. The worst thing is that they really think that life is measured with who you are married to, and how much money he has in his account, these people would never feel happy enough, because there is always this one girl that would get married to someone who is richer or from a so called better family than these people, and that will kill him.. they will never understand the meaning of inner peace.. they are drowning in their own culture making it the priority in life over their happiness.. to people like these, as long people from the outside would see them living the perfect live, then it's ok to live miserably.. I don't think you are one of those people, and the fact that you did the inevitable of keeping your dignity and the courage to stand for your right to live a better life speaks allot about you, don't look back, what you did is not wrong, and no people shouldn't look down at you as if 7araam.. maskeenah.. there is nothing to be maskeenah about.. we need to change that type of stereotype.. you are one like any other young girl.. and have allot to live for and great experiences.. you will one day get to find the one you were supposed to be with.. someone that will look passed this nonsense of the culture..
Cheer up ms. Jones.. lol
Dear Samantha,
Trust me time heals all wounds, and you are better off now. Find yourself again, make yourself whole again, learn to just *be* yourself again. It takes time, but you will be ok. Pay no attention to the typical Kuwaiti marriage ninnies at work and in society around you... I swear, so many of those marriages end up desperately unhappy, unfaithful and fail miserably anyway in todays messed up world...just tune it out, and try to find your own happiness again.
Have faith that there is still a wonderful life to be had for yourself :) And inshallah someone even more wonderful for you :) Please believe me.
Hang in there Samantha :) :) You will be ok when this hard time passes- and it will. You will see. There is a light at the end of the tunnel.
Pulling for you,
MsB
Sam, I don't see any reason why you should feel bad about it, you shouldn't!
Be glad that you made the right choice and don't regret a thing! Life is full of lessons we learn from life each day, let that experience makes you stronger and wiser, don't let those ignorant affect you at all!
yes getting divorce is a hard thing but I'm sure you have decided to get a divorce 'cause you believe you should go separate ways.. you can cry.. crying is good, but don't ever feel sorry about yourself.
sweetie you are still young it's time to live your life the way you want, you can make a lot of changes YOU NEED some changes, how about you start NOT to give a damn about what other people think of you, 'cause what it matters the most is how YOU think of yourself..
On the bright side, you are given a second chance to try again ;)
Yes, Don, i understand that our society hosts so many small minded individuals. I just thought that this girl was a bit different...a bit more open-minded and sophisticated. and the thing is i was truly happy for her..i've noticed that people pray all the time here and pretend to be righteous, but are intrinsically evil in a way. makes me question everything sometimes..thanx for the pep talk. You're amazing, sweetie..
dear ms.baker...everyone is so wonderful in this blogworld..i wish that our whole society was made up of more people like you...thanx darling...
dear sarah,
like you said divorce is hard but at least i got it done..the days i spent going back and forth from the lawyer's office...it was hell..and finally when i did get it, i cried so much i don't think i ever cried that much in my life ever since my dad passed away..thank god for my lovely mother..she was an anchor for me..thank you all for taking the time to support me...xo xo
Sorry about the bad grammar, I don’t know what was running through my mind when I wrote that.. hehehe.. I left work at 10 pm.. so maybe you’ll have a slight idea.. :P
Hey Sam...
I know my comment is a bit late but what the heck ;)
don, Msbaker & sarah have said enough. But I just wanted to wish you the best in life. And Msbaker is right, time will heal. & disregard what those #@$%$%$ at work or even in our society. Be strong & feel proud of yourself & the choices you've made in your life.
Divorce could be the most liberating thing in life. It disassociates you from 'needing' and accustoms you to 'wanting.' Why is that good? Because you will learn that the best love is self-love because you alone are with yourself throughout your life. Now you will go through phases of self-pity and loneliness. Re-evaluate everything and everyone who think they know you and slowly build and foster love in a new light and maybe not for just one person either. You are rebounding now and this blogging business should slightly help you to release and accumalate new experiences.
Good thing you are discreet. I have been burned to the ground! Evil society. You will be fine :)
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